Pick-Up Lines: The Best of the Worst

Warning: Use with extreme caution

Pick-Up Lines: The Best of the Worst

Hayley Simon, Arts & Entertainment Editor

You know them. You dread them. You cringe and laugh (but mostly cringe). And truth be told, they hardly even need an introduction, so without further ado, I give you “The Best of the Worst Pick-Up Lines”

Do you have a name or can I call you mine?

Here, feel my jacket. Do you know what that’s made of? Boyfriend material.

Did you fart? Because you just blew me away.

Do you have a map? I’m getting lost in your eyes.

Hey, do you have an Instagram? My mom always told me to follow my dreams.

You know, your hand looks heavy. Can I hold it for you?

Are you a bank loan? ‘Cause you’ve got my interest.

It’s handy that I have my library card because I am totally checking you out.

Is there something in your eye? Oh wait, never mind, it’s just a sparkle.

Remember me? Oh, wait that’s right. I’ve only met you in my dreams.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

I should call you Google because you have everything I’m searching for.

If I were a cat I’d spend all nine lives with you.

Are you from Tennessee? ‘Cause you’re the only ten-I-see.

Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.

You must be Jamaican because you’re Jamaican me crazy.

Are you a cat? Because I’ve feline a connection between us.

If you were a steak you’d be well done.

Are you lost? Because heaven is a long way from here.

There’s something wrong with my phone. It doesn’t have your number in it.

Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?

Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.

If you were a chicken, you’d be impeccable.

Are you a 90-degree angle? Because you are lookin’ right.

Are you Israeli? Because you Israeli hot.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put “U” and “I” together.

Do you like science? Because I’ve got my ion you.

If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.

Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koala-fications.

Would you grab my arm so I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel?

You know what you’d look really beautiful in? My arms.

You must be a magician because every time I look at you everyone else disappears.

Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?

Disclaimer: Neither The Uproar nor I am responsible for anyone who thinks it is actually a good idea to use one of these pick-up lines to wins someone’s heart. Don’t be a dummy. Have a fantastic Valentine’s Day;)