Roses are red, violets are blue. This V-day I’m alone (again), how ‘bout you?

Ah, the day has come again. The day for flowers, chocolates, and banging your head against the wall (decorated, of course, with lacy hearts cut from coffee filters). I mean, don’t get me wrong, Valentine’s Day is great for those people in relationships, and maybe even for the little kids that decorate a shoe box and exchange Scooby Doo cards– but the same cannot be said for us single pringles out here. Valentine’s day for us is exhausting, to be honest. It’s so anticipated and built up with romance and blushy smiles, but then it blows by in a whirlwind, leaving a sea of bleary-eyed, lovesick fools in its wake.

Okay, so maybe I’m being a bit too hard on V-day. After all, some of my own friends are those “lovesick fools” in relationships this February, so I have to tread carefully. I guess, for us, single people, Valentine’s Day can be described as more of a chore than anything. We’re not totally exempt from the festivities of the day, generally forced to produce “oo’s”, “ah’s”, and “aw’s” whenever a particularly romantic move is made in our presence. We’re also made to be the givers of gift ideas. After all, it’s not like it’s the responsibility of a person in a relationship to know their significant other well enough to buy them a gift. No, no, that’s the wingman/wing woman’s role. To give thoughts, suggestions, and ultimately make the final decision on the gift. So, yes, dear best friend’s boyfriend, you have me to thank for that Amazon gift card and jumbo Hershey’s bar.

Generally, people who dislike Valentine’s Day have personal issues with the holiday. Maybe it reminds them of young love lost, one that could have been great, but ended up in the dumpster before its time. Or even worse, maybe Valentine’s Day fills this ex-lover with vengeance, and they decide to oh-so-lovingly caress their former boyfriend’s car with a baseball bat.

You’ll also find that many people have a distaste for the holiday because it just never goes their way. They have this entire romantic plan set up, but then Cupid’s been drinking too much champagne again and can’t freaking shoot his arrow with the precision that is needed. Like it’s not that hard, buddy. See that cute guy over there? Point your affection arrow right at his heart and let her fly. Please and thanks.

But honestly, my least favorite part about the day is the loss of intimacy. There’s a line between cute and commercialized, and Valentine’s Day seems to be tipping towards the latter of the two. Any affection that is forced isn’t really affection anymore– it’s a show. And I get that there may be some exceptions to this. I guess, there really are some people so in love that they barricade the hallway because they don’t want to let go of each other’s hands. Then you have that dramatic fingertip brush as the sea of people pull them apart. They are spun through the churning waters to their classes as the girl screams, “I’ll never let go, Jack!” and the boy’s like “What the heck? That’s not even my name.”

Of course, there’s always that one couple, as well, that jokingly tries to pull the “no, you say goodbye first” thing, but then suddenly, they’re not joking anymore, and they don’t know what to do, so they stand there until they ultimately decide, “Let’s not say ‘goodbye.’ Let’s just say see you later.”

On top of everything, there’s just so much judgment that comes with being single. People assume that if you don’t have a significant other then you must be the carrier of some rare disease, when, if you really look at the numbers, there are far more single people in our school than those in relationships. Most just assume everyone is in a relationship except for themselves because the said relationships are always shoved in their faces. So, yeah, single people, you’re not as alone as you may feel.

And forget all those judgmental looks anyway! If you want to go out and treat yourself to a giant heart-shaped cake this Valentine’s Day, you do so with pride. You go and fill your shopping cart with every box of chocolate you can find, and you walk out of that store with your head held high. Buy yourself some roses, a teddy bear, and all the other stereotypical gifts of February — maybe you’re not in a relationship at the moment, but who says that should stop you from thriving this Thursday? Valentine’s Day is all about the love right? Well, I say self-love counts, too. Go berserk, my people.