While working my shift at Texas Roadhouse, we got a rather strange request: a woman came up to the host stand asking if we could bring a cake out for her daughter’s high school dance proposal for her boyfriend with “MORP?” written on it. While we said yes, it got me thinking. Since when do we feel the need to go above and beyond for a high school dance?

School dance “proposals” have turned into a way of continually one-upping each other. Your classmates post their “proposals” on social media, and either your idea is stolen by someone else or you now you have to outdo the person before you. There’s constant pressure to meet societal expectations. It makes you wonder when the simple “Hey Jenny, will you go to the dance with me?” turned into a huge material and creative endeavor.  I’m not sure when everyone decided to present a big production for a school dance, but it’s all I’ve known and seen since I was in middle school.

When you’re younger, you can’t wait for someone to ask you to a dance in an extravagant way. While I have been asked to a dance in a considerably “extra” manner, the older I get the more ridiculous I find it. There are all these elaborate proposals when a simple face-to-face conversation would suffice. Students seem to be more concerned about their proposal being a fan-favorite and going viral than about the person saying yes.

This season of dance proposals is just another pressure added to high schoolers’ already stressful lives.

You make such an effort and spend money to make posters and props to go with it, only for a simple “yes.” The risks are high as they could potentially say no, while the rewards are low. You go through the planning and corresponding with their friends just to post pictures on social media of you asking them to an awkward dance.

They have turned into such a big deal and it makes absolutely no sense to me. It could be because I’ve never been obsessed with school dances; although I’ve been to many and I do enjoy dressing up. I can understand why people find these Promposals cute and flattering, but at the end of the day, they are still excessive. Many people already know who they are going with to the dance before their over-the-top grand gesture, so what’s the point of it? It is already assumed that the couple that has been dating for 3 years is going to the dance together. There is no need for either of them to come up with a grand plan to ask the other to the dance.

To me, dance proposals are unnecessary and more trouble than they are actually worth. Our generation often forgets that we are in high school. It is an overemphasized gesture to get attention from others, and they have nothing to do with your significant other, just your social media platform. It’s time teens get back to face-to-face conversation, not just holding up a sign explaining what they want.

Here’s a challenge for this dance season: go up to the person you wish to go with and just simply ask them. It’s not nearly as hard or disappointing as society has made it out to be.