Teen Dating Violence: Here are the Signs

The end of Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month should not turn away our attention

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photo by Katie Golden

No two abusive relationships are alike. Some involve physical violence, while others prey on our emotional needs.

Amanda Lu, Opinions Editor

There are many merits to being a teenager, but it’s no secret that we’re impulsive and ignorant and that we fall in love too quickly. These traits, though usually harmless, can have detrimental consequences. One such consequence is teen dating violence.

February is National Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month, but just because February comes to a close today, it does not mean that our awareness of teen dating violence should go with it. It’s a question worth asking year-round: Do you know the signs?

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Controlling tendencies

Sometimes a need for control can be misconstrued as genuine compassion. The two are definitely not the same. If they won’t let you go out with your friends, dump them. If they try to dictate who you get to communicate with, dump them. And if they try to pressure you into doing anything they want to do that you clearly don’t feel comfortable with, DUMP THEM.

Excessive jealousy

Jealousy can be cute in small doses, but like many things, an excess of it will leave you feeling slimy and uncomfortable. The foundation of a relationship is trust, and if your partner can’t trust you being with other people, that is a severe red flag.

Invasions of your privacy

Just because you are in a relationship with somebody does not mean that they have the right to overlook everything you do. Always keep in mind that you are your own, individual person, and nobody will ever own you.

Physical violence

This one should be obvious. If they ever lay a finger on you in a malicious way, dump them immediately. Don’t mistake it for a random burst of anger. We all get angry, but we don’t all hit people when we do. People who hit their partners are a different breed of human, and you do not want to get involved.

Emotional violence

This one is slightly less obvious. Emotional violence is on a different plane. Sometimes, it’s very clear: your partner will bully or taunt you with names or maybe some sort of blackmail. But sometimes, it’s very hard to detect. It could be small things they say that wear you down over time. The golden rule is that if you start to feel insecure or unhappy about yourself around them, dump them.

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It’s difficult to confront these issues, and it’s even more difficult admitting you have help. There may have been amazing times in your relationship, but the emotional and physical burden of an abusive relationship will impact you more severely than one happy night at your local fair. If you think you’re being abused, don’t hesitate: just leave.

If you think you are a victim of teen dating violence, contact 800-799-SAFE (7233).